Our Midnight Mahatma

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lotus
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Our Midnight Mahatma

Post by lotus » Fri Jul 03, 2020 5:57 pm

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“A poem should have the touch ... the way sunlight falls on Braille.” .......silent lotus

NotQuiteSure
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Re: Our Midnight Mahatma

Post by NotQuiteSure » Sat Jul 04, 2020 10:24 am

.
Hi Lotus.
Well, that's a tricksy one isn't it?
'Mere' seems terribly judgemental (for some reason) and I feel obliged to very keep a close and beady eye on 'midnight.' Colour me suspicious. :)
I don't think the second verse is that satisfying, as if it is missing another element (a conclusion of some sort). But an enjoyable read/challenge as always.

Regards, Not.


.

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lotus
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Re: Our Midnight Mahatma

Post by lotus » Sat Jul 04, 2020 11:27 am

NotQuiteSure wrote:
Sat Jul 04, 2020 10:24 am
.
Hi Lotus.
Well, that's a tricksy one isn't it?
'Mere' seems terribly judgemental (for some reason) and I feel obliged to very keep a close and beady eye on 'midnight.' Colour me suspicious. :)
I don't think the second verse is that satisfying, as if it is missing another element (a conclusion of some sort). But an enjoyable read/challenge as always.

Regards, Not.


.

dear Not

thankyuuu for pointing to judgemental
as it does speak to 'comparisons'

i see your point of wanting more in the 2nd stanza
yet so often situations in life are but observations
and each of us is left to our own discernment
and questioning

an opportunity to expand our vision
to see and understand how others view things

perhaps at times conclusions should be but open ended investigations

a warm smile
silent lotus

“A poem should have the touch ... the way sunlight falls on Braille.” .......silent lotus

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Re: Our Midnight Mahatma

Post by Macavity » Mon Jul 13, 2020 6:07 am

Hi Lotus,

The title rather weighted me to an historical figure rather than its general meaning. I enjoyed the juxtapositions more without that constraint. Loved the park benches/epilogues combination/comparison.

best

mac

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Re: Our Midnight Mahatma

Post by Firebird » Mon Jul 13, 2020 10:09 pm

Hi Lotus,

I too really like the second stanza too. I have to say that the ‘mere’ stood out for me too, but not in a negative way. I like the constraint. The more I think about that first stanza and the ‘comparison‘ the better it gets.

It’s a compelling poem.

Cheers,

Tristan

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