Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

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Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

Postby camus » Wed May 09, 2018 10:13 pm

I'd have preferred to have been out the night before
receiving the news the next day, hung-over and hypercoagulable
slumped in a greasy spoon, diluting via drip-fed-egg

but instead I was here, as I often am, and the world told
me you were dead.

and it was as if a subversive errant uncle had died, one whom
I'd worshipped from afar, but could never quite reach
and who would never reach out.

For years your music made me who I wasn't
and inevitably made me who I am

Playing Transformer on my midi hi-fi over and over
again, studying its structure, to see how it worked
delving deep into your seedy New York, revelling...

You lead me by the throat, you educated by the word
you introduced me to Delmore Schwartz, Coney Island and

Sweet Jane. All Tomorrow’s Parties, A Venus in Furs
Nico, The Black Angel’s Death Song,
a Brownstone, up three flights of stairs...

You know, man, when I was a young man in high school
You believe it or not, I named my son after you, Lou - in Memoriam.
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Re: Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

Postby churinga » Wed May 09, 2018 10:26 pm

I too was a fan. There is a YouTube of 'Walk on the Wild Side' which has all the people he talked about in it. contains film, dialogue and stills. Well worth watching.
https://youtu.be/nAHRAKQMfzA.

I can't see anything to crit, it's both personal, humorous and moving. My only thought is that it would work equally well as a prose poem.

The new-born Prince Louis is also named after him. :D
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Re: Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

Postby NotQuiteSure » Thu May 10, 2018 1:11 pm

     
Hi Camus,
enjoyed the read and the sentiment,
despite the misplaced commas :)


I'd have preferred to have been out the night before
receiving the news the next day, slumped in a greasy spoon,
hung-over and hypercoagulable, diluting via drip-fed-egg[s.]

[I]nstead I was here, as I often am and the world told
me you were dead.

[A]nd it was as if a[n] errant, subversive uncle had died,
one whom I'd worshipped from afar, but could never quite reach
-do you need 'from afar' ?
and who would never reach out.

For years your music made me who I wasn't
and inevitably made me who I am
-not keen on 'and inevitably', perhaps 'until it' ?

Playing Transformer on my midi hi-fi over and over
again, studying its structure to see how it worked,
delving deep into your seedy New York, revelling...

You [led] me by the throat, you educated by the word
- do you need the second 'you' ?
you introduced me to Delmore Schwartz, [to] Coney Island[,]

[to]Sweet Jane[,] All Tomorrow’s Parties, A Venus in Furs
Nico, The Black Angel’s Death Song, a Brownstone,
up three flights of stairs...

You know, man, when I was a young man in high school
- is there something missing here?
You believe it or not, I named my son after you, Lou - in Memoriam.
- do you need 'You believe it or not' ?


Regards, Not.

     
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Re: Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

Postby 1lankest » Fri May 11, 2018 10:48 am

Really enjoyed this Camus, and nice to read you again.

The metre and melancholy accord nicely with the bluesy theme - I am left with a funereal sense of sadness and celebration.

Not sure you need ‘revelling...’.

‘subversive errant’ - one of these would do. Subversive perhaps.

‘Sweet Jane. All Tomorrow’s Parties, A Venus in Furs
Nico, The Black Angel’s Death Song,’

- this seems a little heavy on the cultural references. Quite dense.

Luke
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Re: Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

Postby RCJames » Wed May 23, 2018 9:57 pm

Camus - You got the connection - the way he would have dug -

I'd have preferred to have been out the night before
receiving the news the next day, hung-over and hypercoagulable --------I don't think the word does much for the continuity or rhythm of the piece -
slumped in a greasy spoon, diluting via drip-fed-egg ---------------------------"hung over and slumped" seems to capture the mood

but instead I was here, as I often am, and the world told
me you were dead.

and it was as if a subversive errant uncle had died, one whom
I'd worshipped from afar, but could never quite reach
and who would never reach out.-------------like this characterization

For years your music made me who I wasn't
and inevitably made me who I am ----------------great turn here - kind of a twist on Dylan's "I was so much older then/ I'm younger than that now."

Playing Transformer on my midi hi-fi over and over
again, studying its structure, to see how it worked
delving deep into your seedy New York, revelling...

You lead me by the throat, you educated by the word
you introduced me to Delmore Schwartz, Coney Island and -----------Interesting how Schwartz really was his mentor

Sweet Jane. All Tomorrow’s Parties, A Venus in Furs
Nico, The Black Angel’s Death Song,
a Brownstone, up three flights of stairs... ------------encapsulates the 60's West Village scene well

(You know, man,) when I was (a young man) in high school
(You believe it or not,) I named my son after you, (Lou - in Memoriam.)-----------Maybe short and to the point, as he often was. - RC
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Re: Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

Postby David » Sun May 27, 2018 3:17 pm

A good, personal elegy. (What's the Adrian Henri connection?)

I did not know that about your son.

churinga wrote:I can't see anything to crit, it's both personal, humorous and moving.

Yes, I'd go along with Ross on that - although, for myself, I always found more to repel than to attract about Lou. That's irrelevant, of course.

You did him proud.

Cheers

David
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Re: Poem in Memoriam Lou Reed (after Adrian Henri)

Postby Wilcken » Wed Jun 20, 2018 10:49 pm

Camus!

How the heck are ya!

So great to read this piece, mentors and true human idols are rare and wonderful. I liked reshuffle g about your experience and his influence. The opening images work quite well.

I really appreciated that you did not stop short of diving into your own process about his process.

Hope you are well.

Cheers

Jane
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