bodkin wrote: see what you mean about the end. I will think about it but I may have painted myself into a corner with finding "ools" rhymes.
Ros wrote:Should win prizes just for the title. I think the revision is an improvement. It's so hard to get a sense of progression with these weird repeating forms, but I think you've managed it here.
ray miller wrote:Is it too late to say that I preferred the original version?
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