Drifted Away

Check out the PG iPod: hear PG poets reading their poems.
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churinga
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Drifted Away

Post by churinga » Tue Sep 25, 2018 10:31 pm

https://youtu.be/9u07R_lSjyI

A song I posted to YouTube.

Final written version.

The cab has gone.
The street is empty.
Nothing left to spoil the view.
Nothing left but the thought of you.

Nothing left to do or say.
All that was said or left unspoken.
Promises broken.
Drifted away

like mist in the morning
as the night slowly ends.
Like the emptiness there
where the highway begins.
Last edited by churinga on Wed Oct 24, 2018 6:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Pauline
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Re: Drifted Away

Post by Pauline » Wed Oct 17, 2018 6:51 pm

OMG!
Ross, what where you thinking when you posted this?
It's absolutely dire.
Holy jayzus.!
You've wrote this.
It's an emotional piece that means something to you.
So, why on earth did you not take the time to memorize the words
and deliver them with feeling???
It's like you can't be arsed.
You barely made eye contact .
I drifted away listening to you.
Very early on.
It was hard work making it to the end.
Sorry Ross, but singing isn't your forte.
I don't wish to be harsh but I don't remember any of the lyrics of your song
just the seriously bad delivery.
You have work to do.

Sorry, but after 108 hits someone needs to tell you.
How will you know, how will you grow.
You can do this Ross.
You can make it happen.
I'm sure you can write an opera.
Just leave the singing to the experts :D

churinga
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Re: Drifted Away

Post by churinga » Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:08 pm

Sorry you didn't like it Pauline, if it sucks it sucks.
This was recorded years ago. I'm in my 70's now, no longer creative
except for the very occasional poem.

peace and blessings

Ross

Pauline
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Re: Drifted Away

Post by Pauline » Fri Oct 19, 2018 10:14 pm

churinga wrote:
Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:08 pm
Sorry you didn't like it Pauline, if it sucks it sucks.
It doesn't suck Ross.
What sucks is your can't be arsed approach to it.
churinga wrote:
Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:08 pm
This was recorded years ago. I'm in my 70's now, no longer creative
except for the very occasional poem.
Ross, age is just a number. You have a creative mind, use it.
I've read the critiques you post to others.
Very informative , and encouraging.
I've also read your poems.
They are sharp, challenging, and diverse .
This does not come from a cloudy has been mind.
You still have loads to offer.
Live in the moment Ross.

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Re: Drifted Away

Post by Pauline » Sat Oct 20, 2018 8:21 pm

I am so sorry Ross.
Please ignore my previous posts.
How condescending do I come across.
That honestly was not how I meant to portray my message.
All I wanted to say was your video did not come across as a confident piece.
Sorry for being an arse.

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Re: Drifted Away

Post by Mirrorball » Tue Oct 23, 2018 9:28 pm

Hi Ross,

I was intrigued to see what you (used to) look like but the video performance doesn't bother me too much. I can happily listen to your song without the video. The lyrics are much simpler than your poetry and the music is quite haunting. Could you post the lyrics?

Thanks for sharing.

MB

churinga
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Re: Drifted Away

Post by churinga » Wed Oct 24, 2018 6:07 pm

MB

I have done so.

cheers

Ross

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