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Bonnie & Clyde v2

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2020 1:30 pm
by NotQuiteSure
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Bonnie & Clyde (2020)



Captured here by video surveillance
the outlaws,
wearing their trademark red hats
ID'd, arrested
in less than an hour
the only ones without a mask in the bank.

Brought back alive
boasted the sheriff
it weren't as if either were black.



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Bonehead & Clyde (2020)



Captured here by video surveillance
the outlaws,
wearing their trademark red hats
ID'd and arrested
in less than an hour
the only ones without a mask in the bank




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Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2020 2:31 pm
by Macavity
Went web searching Not. I presume the title is playing around with Bonnie and Clyde (the latter could relate to the Anthill mob as well), but I didn't find any definitive red hat images (obviously I'm missing something). Perhaps there is some news story floating about?

The law breakers not wearing a mask is a nicely ironic image.

best

mac

Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2020 4:34 pm
by NotQuiteSure
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Hi mac,
I'd forgotten the Anthill mob, delighted to be reminded.
'Red hats', just a reference to those MAGA hats of Trump.

Regards, Not

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Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2020 7:59 pm
by Macavity
Red hats', just a reference to those MAGA hats of Trump.
:idea: I should have guessed!

No doubt an amnesty would be granted :evil:

cheers

mac

Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Sun Aug 02, 2020 11:52 am
by NotQuiteSure
Macavity wrote:
Sat Aug 01, 2020 7:59 pm
:idea: I should have guessed!
You really should :)

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Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Sun Aug 02, 2020 4:33 pm
by springchic1979
2 normal citizens going about their everyday business are now considered/labeled as outlaws and social outcasts for having the audacity to continue to live life normally AND for having an unpopular political opinion...though neither made you a pariah until recently.

Honestly though, I liked liked the irony!

Nice write.
respectfully,
YDS

Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2020 10:31 am
by NotQuiteSure
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Hi Y,
I hadn't foreseen that 'outlaw' could be exploited in that way. (Always nice when you discover you've hidden depths.)
Would it enhance your interpretation were the title to be (the less? pejorative) Bonnie & Clyde (2020)?

Many thanks.

Regards, Not


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Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2020 12:28 pm
by springchic1979
Now that you mention it...i'm not sure if 'bonehead' really goes well in the title. If you took out the perjorative 'bonehead' you leave it more open for the reader to interpret how they choose. (just my opinion)

I do rather like the idea of giving it a slightly different title like:
Bonnie & Clyde 2020
or Modern day Bonnie & Clyde.

Title aside, it was definitely a good write. It does make me wonder what other normal everyday opinions and behaviors will all of a sudden be considered 'punishable'...

Re: Bonehead & Clyde

Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2020 1:18 pm
by NotQuiteSure
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Hi Y,
title changed.

Thanks again.

Regards, Not


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Re: Bonnie & Clyde

Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2020 2:41 pm
by Macavity
Thumbs up on the title change. Liking this more, now that I am keying into the changing perceptions of criminality and not web searching on the title!

best

mac

Re: Bonnie & Clyde

Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2020 3:01 pm
by NotQuiteSure
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Thanks mac,
Credit to Y for that. She/he saw that to which I was smugly oblivious :)

Regards, Not


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Re: Bonnie & Clyde v2

Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2020 10:37 am
by NotQuiteSure
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- tweaked -

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Re: Bonnie & Clyde v2

Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2020 12:24 pm
by Macavity
hi Not

I think you lose the 'black' humour of the original with the additional theme.

best

mac

Re: Bonnie & Clyde v2

Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2020 12:40 pm
by springchic1979
This does change the feel of the poem. It goes from irony to something that could be considered crude humor. There is nothing wrong with that type of humor if that is what you are going for.

However, with all the information 'implied' one might be able to argue that those two people wouldn't have been arrested in the first place. . .

respectfully,
YDS

Re: Bonnie & Clyde v2

Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2020 1:17 pm
by NotQuiteSure
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Hi mac, Y
I think you're probably right, thanks for revisiting.

Regards, Not

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