The Rising and the Shining

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bjondon
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The Rising and the Shining

Post by bjondon » Wed Apr 24, 2019 6:56 pm

Age sharpens desire
True, its younger blunter form
bore all the weight
-and what a bore!
But now the balance swings, exact
Find what you need to do and act
Could there be anything simpler than that?

Forget the sex
That fruit may or may not fall into your lap
We all are robots
filled with desire
And Jung, that dear, said our greatest weights
would be those dreams
borne and then bequeathed by mum and dad
the ones that were squashed flat

How many locked-in-step or thumb-to-nose
abnegatives did you yourself enact?
Clouds roil and tumble, then part
Quite when who knows, no longer tos and fros
flatlands announce themselves
and we go out



V1

Age sharpens desire
True, its younger blunter form
bore all the weight
- and what a bore!
But now the balance swings, exact
Find what you need to do and act
Could there be anything
simpler than that?
Last edited by bjondon on Mon Apr 29, 2019 5:07 pm, edited 7 times in total.

Macavity
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Re: The Rising and the Shining

Post by Macavity » Thu Apr 25, 2019 7:51 pm

Hi Jules

Age sharpens desire...as a generalisation I haven't found that so, bit I do agree with the proposition Find what you need to do and act...though to use another commonplace...easier said than done :D

cheers

mac

bjondon
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Re: The Rising and the Shining

Post by bjondon » Fri Apr 26, 2019 12:22 pm

Thanks mac . . . I suppose I am playing with the definition
and attributed weight given to desire. We both rise and shine.
J

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Firebird
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Re: The Rising and the Shining

Post by Firebird » Fri Apr 26, 2019 9:16 pm

Hi Jules,

I understand what you are saying here about desire being sharpened by age, and how youthful desire is blunted by weight. But does ‘weight’ here refer to sex drive/pressure to perform? If it’s drive the distinction between desire and drive is a subtle one. If it’s pressure it implies you are saying that when we are young it’s harder to relax when having sex because of the pressure there is to perform, and that when this is lifted our performance improves. I don’t think it’s really clear at the moment which you really mean though.

Cheers,

Tristan
bjondon wrote:
Wed Apr 24, 2019 6:56 pm
Age sharpens desire
True, its younger blunter form
bore all the weight
- and what a bore!
But now the balance swings, exact
Find what you need to do and act
Could there be anything
simpler than that?

ton321
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Re: The Rising and the Shining

Post by ton321 » Fri Apr 26, 2019 10:01 pm

Age sharpens desire
True, its younger blunter form
bore all the weight
- and what a bore!
But now the balance swings, exact
Find what you need to do and act
Could there be anything
simpler than that?

Hi BJ

I like the title of the piece, that refers to the saying-rise and shine ie morning/youth, then there is the sexual rising( i dont need to say any more do i?), and the shining ie later on in life. I'm not entirely convinced by the argument, but i understand what you are saying. Nice piece,
Tony
Counting the beats,
Counting the slow heart beats,
The bleeding to death of time in slow heart beats,
Wakeful they lie.

Robert Graves

bjondon
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Re: The Rising and the Shining

Post by bjondon » Sat Apr 27, 2019 1:37 pm

Thanks for partially rescuing this Tony.
Tristan and mac . . . glad you are responding
and pointing where I have miscued.
A revision should be up any moment soon.
Jules

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Re: The Rising and the Shining

Post by HonourStedman » Sun Apr 28, 2019 2:50 pm

That is quite some shortening from the original to version 1, dear Jules, and I think you were wise to take an axe to the original. That is not meant as a major criticism because I admire your tackling of a difficult subject - as I know as I near pension age myself. I like the fact that you take a distinct position vis-a-vis the question of sex as it affects the young and the old, and it may be that in the next revision, you might be able to add back in a few lines clarifying your feelings in a direct way.

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