Search found 217 matches

by Katherine
Thu Nov 17, 2016 8:38 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: This Weakened State (2nd Edit )
Replies: 11
Views: 686

Re: This Weakened State

Katherine, unless you're extremely rich and at the centre of controlling the little man, none of the poem relates to anything being your fault. Regards I was merely stating how alienated I feel by the choices made by 'everyman'. I feel angry at the 'powers that be', but also frightened by those who...
by Katherine
Wed Nov 16, 2016 2:37 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Autumn's Message
Replies: 9
Views: 820

Re: Autumn's Message

Relax among the death of leaves, easy on the eye and mind. Dropped gyrating in the breeze, yesterday now left behind. ... I'm going to get irritatingly arsey - Leaves are detritus. Effortless the death of leaves, life now lived and time to die. ... We lose hairs; is that a 'death' too? Let not the h...
by Katherine
Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:34 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: This Weakened State (2nd Edit )
Replies: 11
Views: 686

Re: This Weakened State

I get it.
Yeah, it's shit isn't it?
We, who are so 'enlightened', are adrift with our certainties, having lost all connection with 'Everyman'!
Mea culpa. ;) x
by Katherine
Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:28 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: On Withered Vines
Replies: 9
Views: 881

Re: On Withered Vines

Very 'Fifty Shades of Grey'.
Brilliantly unpleasant. x
by Katherine
Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:20 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Dumbo
Replies: 15
Views: 1111

Re: Dumbo

I can still see it now a round elephant of blown glass sitting on its shelf in the unheated lounge of my my grandmothers house. ....... I love this! Grandparents are, the world over, frugal. It was as light as air congealed into something holdable. Its trunk caught the light sometimes. ........Mneh,...
by Katherine
Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:00 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Waiting (2nd Edit)
Replies: 11
Views: 1091

Re: Waiting (2nd Edit)

This reminds me of Mr. Parkinson - a neighbour of mine. He was a lovely, old lad who'd lost his wife a long time ago, had no children to care for him and whose house had gone to rack and ruin. He was ''The Nice Man With Sweeties', which he offered to children as they passed by. Sadly, in this day an...
by Katherine
Sun Oct 16, 2016 12:53 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Hurricane - Revision V
Replies: 30
Views: 2988

Re: Hurricane - Revision

Luce wrote:
Do you think I'm talking about a hurricane in England? It looks like I got to make this clearer.

Luce
Ha! No, I'm trying to explain how 'hurricanes' are viewed, from afar, here in England. They sound terrifying, but this doesn't. Sorry. x
by Katherine
Fri Oct 14, 2016 11:55 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Hurricane - Revision V
Replies: 30
Views: 2988

Re: Hurricane - Revision

The dog and Matthew were worried. Jake told horror stories, about previous hurricanes. You were frightened and worried about the ducks. When it was over, you thought of petal-strewn beds, while everything returned as normal. Forgive me, but a 'hurricane', in England (which never gets them - because ...
by Katherine
Fri Oct 14, 2016 10:33 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Dreamscape
Replies: 7
Views: 804

Re: Dreams

I lay down enslaved by life, and as I sleep freedom falls upon me. Nice image Gone is my world cast with nervous endings. I catch my breath as I enter a place of equality for all. Good dreams or . bad, they come free to both the rich and poor. ... Yeah, but the poor are dreaming about a better class...
by Katherine
Fri Oct 14, 2016 9:42 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Message from the Tower (revision 2)
Replies: 14
Views: 982

Re: Message from the Tower

I had an absolute hoot, reading this. I take it that you ventured on 'holiday' somewhere in Britain, most probably England - where we don't give a shit - because, if you have to stay here for your 'holidays', you're not worth catering for! Top end - you'll never get a better lick-spittle experience ...
by Katherine
Fri Oct 14, 2016 9:04 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Aching to be Young Again. -Revision.
Replies: 17
Views: 1450

Re: Aching to be Young Again.

Pre-dawn beach running = admirable. Come on, you can do it! No, I can’t. Well, I could, but I’d be wrecked for the rest of the day! It was a five-miler – Down to Gypsies Green and along The Leas, up Marsden bank heading to The Nook and a right turn down King George Road to home. This perked me up, ...
by Katherine
Thu Oct 06, 2016 6:37 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: On encountering an African lion in Doncaster
Replies: 11
Views: 1011

Re: On encountering an African lion at Doncaster wildlife pa

Rescued from a Romanian zoo where caged since a cub in a two metre square cube he now couldn't survive on his own. ... So, now he's in Britain. Lions are better off here. Naturally. Some admire, some pity as he snarls and roars at teenagers who taunt him. ...So much better than Romanian teenagers! T...
by Katherine
Thu Oct 06, 2016 6:03 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Aching to be Young Again. -Revision.
Replies: 17
Views: 1450

Aching to be Young Again. -Revision.

I rise and shake myself awake and take good care to nurse the ache of feet and legs then, stretch my back. The day starts well, without a crack. In younger days, I used to jump out of my bed - before this slump- and run along to Gypsies’ Green to watch the sunrise – so serene. The North Sea held the...
by Katherine
Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:58 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Marilyn's Paradox (villanelle) (Revision 3) + nudge
Replies: 24
Views: 1798

Re: Marilyn's Paradox (villanelle) (Revision 3) + nudge

She had broad tastes, so what’s the fuss about? ....... She was bisexual? So, she had a taste for 'broads? Her anxious mind manoeuvred on the strips because her fans were sometimes full of doubt. ........ 'strips'? Don't get the 'doubt' bit. Her focused eyes were like a talent scout and quivering sm...
by Katherine
Sat Oct 01, 2016 8:37 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: the families of the fishermen rev4
Replies: 22
Views: 1088

Re: fishing rev2

their names on stones circle the kirk ......... This makes me think of gravestones with the names of the deceased. winter rolls waves of curiosity over a cove of roofless houses Is this about the death of a fishing village, where everyone has vanished without trace -except for those in the graveyard...
by Katherine
Sat Oct 01, 2016 8:02 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Summer's End and Autumn's Start
Replies: 12
Views: 990

Re: Summer's End and Autumn's Start

Summer's End and Autumn's Start ..... I've been thinking about this, too. To walk a beach in no man's land, where neither does the summer sun nor chill of autumn stir the soul, lets contemplation have its run. I have a problem with the metre, here. Summer's end and Autumn's start; nature's mediocrit...
by Katherine
Sat Oct 01, 2016 7:25 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Death Of A Town
Replies: 8
Views: 673

Re: Death Of A Town

The town wheezes the last rites over its people through phlegm-ridden lungs. . .....................I know this state. But, where I live it's coaly phlegm. Its blistered wounds are coated in the mud that lines its harbour. ..............Our harbours are all redeveloped with expensive housing develop...
by Katherine
Tue Sep 20, 2016 2:17 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Comparisons
Replies: 8
Views: 784

Re: Comparisons

The birds that fly high in the sky do not impress me ... interesting... is it a metaphor? nearly as much as those that skim a foot or so above a field, because they inhabit your domain, although they're not as fixed as you? since when I jump I feel their flight defying what happens to me. Not quite ...
by Katherine
Sat Sep 17, 2016 9:36 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Herod's Heirs
Replies: 38
Views: 3241

Re: Herod's Heirs

The cat, among the pigeons, sat.
I've said my piece, so that is that.
I'm either right, or I'm a twat,
But questioning - what's wrong with that?
x
by Katherine
Wed Sep 14, 2016 12:05 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: The Wrong People (revision)
Replies: 20
Views: 2086

Re: The Wrong People (revision)

I like the sentiment, I think, behind this poem. More jaw-jaw? Walking through the west end of Newcastle, you will find there is no 32-68/35-79 etc on many streets. But, there are little 'play-parks' for children. I'm not old enough to know what war is truly like, nor young enough not to fear it, ha...
by Katherine
Tue Sep 13, 2016 11:26 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Smoke Revision-1
Replies: 6
Views: 716

Re: Smoke Revision-1

There's something in this. It reminds me of 'The Graduate', when Mrs Robinson holds in the smoke, while Ben kisses her.
The rhythm is a bit off. Try playing around with it. x
by Katherine
Tue Sep 13, 2016 11:11 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Not my time
Replies: 21
Views: 1828

Re: Not my time

A Santander cashier transferred a six-figure sum to a woman who passed herself off as Gloria Hunniford, explaining she didn’t know the TV personality because she was, ‘Not my time’. ... Unfortunately, she's mine. You’re not my time, Jaxx says to me, as if I’m Orville or Wilbur Wright, Madame Curie ...
by Katherine
Tue Sep 13, 2016 8:18 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Herod's Heirs
Replies: 38
Views: 3241

Re: Herod's Heirs

OK, I've thrown a few toys out of the pram - trope. To describe people as 'Herod', skewering 'babies' - hyperbole -, has set the cat amongst the pigeons - trope.

Mea culpa.

Can we defrost and move on? x
by Katherine
Tue Sep 13, 2016 8:09 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Herod's Heirs
Replies: 38
Views: 3241

Re: Herod's Heirs

Instead of focussing on a person's experience you could offer a two tiered level of critique. The forum guidelines more or less do this anyway. So why not simply bring it to the fore? The idea of having two forums isn't a bad one in my opinion. I remember posting in Mild Critique, as a new member, ...
by Katherine
Mon Sep 12, 2016 11:24 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Herod's Heirs
Replies: 38
Views: 3241

Re: Herod's Heirs

The original idea of Experienced and Beginners, as I understand it, was so that if someone posted in Beginners it was assumed they might appreciate a gentler crit and those who had been here longer would understand that the person might still be finding their feet with the basic craft. Posting in E...