Search found 1583 matches

by Firebird
Tue May 07, 2019 8:35 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Losing People (A didactic poem)
Replies: 6
Views: 156

Losing People (A didactic poem)

It started with hundreds then thousands, and though some protested, most did not: it seemed distant - nothing more than hearsay. They didn’t like them much anyway. When it was too late, pictures and numbers were pushed in front of their faces and they began to understand. Don’t let this process of d...
by Firebird
Mon May 06, 2019 8:24 pm
Forum: Hello, Good Evening and Welcome
Topic: Hi
Replies: 6
Views: 231

Re: Hi

Welcome Leaf.

Yes, moving home is hard and normally involves more work than we anticipated.

I look forward to reading some of your work.

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Fri May 03, 2019 7:33 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: My Dream
Replies: 13
Views: 167

Re: My Dream

I like it. I think the second and third stanzas, especially the second, could have more colour/specific details. But the poem moves along well and I like the rhymes - they don’t feel forced to me. I don’t like ‘date expired kippers’. How about ‘out of date kippers’ I know it doesn’t help the metre o...
by Firebird
Fri May 03, 2019 3:30 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: In a Nutshell
Replies: 4
Views: 112

Re: In a Nutshell

Was this when Blair supported the U.S. in Iraq? Yes it was. Of course you are right Ray, Blair tried to give many reasons for going to war, but the point I suppose I’m making is that after having them all pretty much rejected he must found it harder and harder to say what for, with people calling h...
by Firebird
Fri May 03, 2019 7:21 am
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Poetry 24 (x1)
Replies: 0
Views: 59

Poetry 24 (x1)

I have a poem featured in Poetry 24 today. It’s about Corbyn and antisemitism. http://www.poetry24.co.uk/2019/05/no-caveats.html?m=1

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Fri May 03, 2019 6:37 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: In a Nutshell
Replies: 4
Views: 112

In a Nutshell

(My attempted at a little humour on this bleak Friday morning.)

Blair found it easy
to go to war
but much harder
to say what for.
by Firebird
Thu May 02, 2019 9:41 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Death in the Time of Brexit - renegotiated
Replies: 14
Views: 854

Re: Death in the Time of Brexit - renegotiated

Hi Ray,

Good to see you back.

This is the poem you’ve just had published in Snakeskin. It’s a really good one. Should I put it in Finishing touch?

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Wed May 01, 2019 6:09 pm
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Ray and I appearing in Snakeskin.
Replies: 4
Views: 233

Ray and I appearing in Snakeskin.

Many congrats Ray on your Brexit poem being published in Snakeskin. Enjoyed!

http://www.snakeskinpoetry.co.uk

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Wed May 01, 2019 6:04 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Duende (oh oh)
Replies: 21
Views: 294

Re: Duende (oh oh)

Oh well, my interp was miles out. I’d thought it was a poem about loss and loneliness. N’s search for duende I thought was the search for the ghost of their lost one. You should sub it to Algebra of Owls, as they specifically ask for poems with duende in their submission criteria. And your poem cert...
by Firebird
Tue Apr 30, 2019 9:08 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Duende (oh oh)
Replies: 21
Views: 294

Re: Duende (oh oh)

I like it David, a lot. Some lovely turns of phrase, such as ‘The beauty of unserviceable words’. I’ve read most of Lorca, though some time ago now, and you are alluding to the poem ‘Alone’ in lines 5/6, and it’s a beautiful allusion, as the image of the lamb and wolf that follows in Lorca’s poem al...
by Firebird
Mon Apr 29, 2019 10:09 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: On Wanting a Chair to be a Chippendale (V2)
Replies: 12
Views: 253

Re: On Wanting a Chair to be a Chippendale (V2)

Perry, thanks for the encouragement. Much appreciated, and I’ve taken on board your suggestion.

Honour, I’m pleased your liked the poem.

Many thanks both for commenting.

I’ve posted v2.

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Mon Apr 29, 2019 9:44 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)
Replies: 19
Views: 291

Re: Parc Cwm Darran (revision)

Hi Mac, I think ‘willows’ at the end of L8 is an improvement, but not totally convinced by the repetition of ‘willow’ in the next line. ‘Willow warbler’ sounds nice, but I think ‘warbler’ would do, as it’s implied the bird is a ‘willow warbler’ from the line before I think. Maybe I’m knit picking. I...
by Firebird
Mon Apr 29, 2019 9:33 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Dancing Girl (new ending)
Replies: 13
Views: 282

Re: Dancing Girl

However, I agree with you that it might be a stretch that the girl danced for 40+ years because of the one incident described in the poem, but even that is entirely possible. Children often have experiences in their formative years which are life-changing, and which set them in a new direction. And...
by Firebird
Mon Apr 29, 2019 9:16 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Shame
Replies: 3
Views: 75

Re: Shame

It’s a good Not, and powerful as Mac said. I think it’s pretty much there, too. I just have a couple of tiny knits below. . Shame My uncle tells this story 'bout a girl, when he was stationed in the Far East: said she was young and beautiful, and clean. Until the day she wasn't, when his pal starts ...
by Firebird
Sun Apr 28, 2019 7:40 pm
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Northwords Now3
Replies: 3
Views: 61

Re: Northwords Now3

Many congrats Seth! I like all three poems, but especially ‘Ineffable‘. I like how your poems often embrace a bits of philosophy (Wittgenstein’s in ‘Ineffable’ I believe) with a local concrete context. Good stuff!

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Sun Apr 28, 2019 9:23 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)
Replies: 19
Views: 291

Re: Parc Cwm Darran

I think it’s great Mac. I especially like the final line. Will be back with a crit tonight if I can find anything which I think will help improve the poem further. Cheers, Tristan The sign promises a lakeside view. It is a pond. A watery glint from mines. The cafe offers filter or instant coffee, bu...
by Firebird
Fri Apr 26, 2019 9:16 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: The Rising and the Shining
Replies: 6
Views: 154

Re: The Rising and the Shining

Hi Jules, I understand what you are saying here about desire being sharpened by age, and how youthful desire is blunted by weight. But does ‘weight’ here refer to sex drive/pressure to perform? If it’s drive the distinction between desire and drive is a subtle one. If it’s pressure it implies you ar...
by Firebird
Fri Apr 26, 2019 8:55 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: On Wanting a Chair to be a Chippendale (V2)
Replies: 12
Views: 253

Re: On Wanting a Chair to be a Chippendale

Many thanks all for commenting. I’d love to say you were right Jules with your interpretation, but I’m afraid it was just a bit of a tortured comparison and had nothing to do with slavery. Perry, really pleased you like the language and you may be right about the comparison being a bit too much like...
by Firebird
Fri Apr 26, 2019 8:42 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Girl with Boa
Replies: 10
Views: 235

Re: Girl with Boa

Hi Not,

You could finish the poem with ‘And I held my breath’, and it would be a good poem, but I think it would be better still with a little more.

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Fri Apr 26, 2019 8:39 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Dancing Girl (new ending)
Replies: 13
Views: 282

Re: Dancing Girl

But! … your narrative seems to attribute rsther simplistic blame to the parents . . . I think this 'indifference' needs to be grounded in some more telling details. It also seems to frame the induction of women into prostitution/complicity with misogeny as a sort of quaint fairytale which I don't t...
by Firebird
Fri Apr 26, 2019 8:32 pm
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Ink, Sweat & Tears x1
Replies: 2
Views: 58

Ink, Sweat & Tears x1

Very happy to have just had a poem accepted for publication in Ink, Sweat & Tears on May 8th.

Cheers,

Tristan
by Firebird
Mon Apr 22, 2019 8:29 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: It's the revolution guys!
Replies: 2
Views: 123

Re: It's the revolution guys!

Hi Jules, I really don’t agree with the main thrust of your poem (I.e. a different type of capitalism can save us and the world). Yes, capitalism helped free us from the bonds of surfdom and even some would argue allowed free speech to flourish, via privately owned papers being funded by adverts, an...
by Firebird
Mon Apr 22, 2019 8:11 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Girl with Boa
Replies: 10
Views: 235

Re: Girl with Boa

Hi Not, I didn’t relate this poem to the rocky horror show, but did get the rest of your references, even the fishnet stockings which I thought was clear and clever considering the context. I would like this poem much more if you dropped the Rocky horror connection, (which I think the poem is far to...
by Firebird
Mon Apr 22, 2019 7:55 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Fugue [was 'leave a message'] version 2
Replies: 15
Views: 377

Re: leave a message

I like your poem too, and as Mac said the repetition adds to the mechanical feel. I’m not sure about the word ‘fugue’ in the first line though. I’m not even sure you need the first line. However, ‘fugue’ would make a great title. I read the poem as N talking to him/herself - expressing a disconnecti...
by Firebird
Sun Apr 21, 2019 9:42 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: On Wanting a Chair to be a Chippendale (V2)
Replies: 12
Views: 253

On Wanting a Chair to be a Chippendale (V2)

V2 I pride myself that I can trace in these rickety legs and back a lively tight-knit symmetry of acanthus leaves and curlicues; and in the back-splat’s tracery flames of Cuban mahogany; bold and vital carving in the woodwormed cabrioles; a noble, upright frame through the years of dirt and grease. ...