Search found 4354 matches

by Macavity
Sun Dec 09, 2018 2:20 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Elderly Japanese couple, Agrigento (revised)
Replies: 12
Views: 200

Re: Elderly Japanese couple, Agrigento (revised)

Hi Luke, Read this a few times over the last couple of days and, like Ros, don't feel prompted to suggest changes. The poem is an expression of your voice and aesthetic, which I have come to appreciate. The change you have made, in terms of format, does enhance the read. I was engaged by the observe...
by Macavity
Sun Dec 09, 2018 3:08 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: The Fürstenzug (Procession of Princes)
Replies: 3
Views: 61

Re: The Fürstenzug (Procession of Princes)

Been on holiday Elph :) Actually, I did feel the poignancy in the closing lines, which travelled beyond the historical tourism. The 'majesty' swallowed in the realities of world wars.

two poems in a year! excessive...

no nits to offer at this point

enjoyed

mac
by Macavity
Sun Dec 09, 2018 2:36 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Submeowpow
Replies: 6
Views: 94

Re: Submeowpow

I love words :) The black/white grid has a familiar strength. Most of all, I'm reminded of a wordsearch page. The latter perhaps a random generator for those in need of a poem :D

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sat Dec 08, 2018 4:25 am
Forum: Post Visual Art
Topic: The Perch Pond
Replies: 4
Views: 92

Re: The Perch Pond

A lovely hopeful light to rescue a viewer from these dark winter days :)

thanks for sharing JJ!

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sat Dec 08, 2018 4:14 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Unpacking the Problem (V4)
Replies: 18
Views: 206

Re: Unpacking the Problem (V4)

Not only do we use plastic but our actions seem sealed between its blackness and transparency. hi Tristan Neat line-breaks and symmetry in the form. I didn't pick up the 'blackness' meaning, but others have keyed into the context, so that is just my reader ignorance. I did connect with sealed/trans...
by Macavity
Sat Dec 08, 2018 3:50 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Identifying remains
Replies: 6
Views: 65

Re: Identifying remains

He was in the canal for two weeks and not much left of him, they said.........................rumour/gossip They found a unique pattern.........................science/forensics of dental records and metal rods in one of his legs..........................individuality At the crematorium you could sm...
by Macavity
Wed Dec 05, 2018 7:45 pm
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Algebra of Owls
Replies: 8
Views: 1134

Re: Algebra of Owls

https://algebraofowls.com/2018/12/05/an ... stan-moss/

Congratulations again Tristan!

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Wed Dec 05, 2018 4:01 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Tin Whiskers
Replies: 8
Views: 239

Re: Tin Whiskers

I don't think this poem will ever be quite right.
hi Ross

Which lines are niggling?
by Macavity
Sun Dec 02, 2018 6:48 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Tin Whiskers
Replies: 8
Views: 239

Re: Tin Whiskers

Hi Ross,

From 1. I read strategy/resilience/inevitability

From 2. I read anonymity/possibilities/solitude

From 3. The write returns to 'limits', restrictions, but the end emphasis is a connectivity, a resurrection of hope. Away from isolation.

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sat Dec 01, 2018 7:07 pm
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Three Drops From A Cauldron (1)
Replies: 6
Views: 128

Re: Three Drops From A Cauldron (1)

Thanks David. Nash led me to that mag along time ago and I've been hooked since...


https://threedropspoetry.co.uk/2015/01/ ... hn-c-nash/

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sat Dec 01, 2018 7:01 pm
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Tristan in Snakeskin
Replies: 3
Views: 82

Re: Tristan in Snakeskin

Congratulations Tristan. I remember both of these thought provoking writes.

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sat Dec 01, 2018 4:17 pm
Forum: Ezines, Magazines and Publications
Topic: Three Drops From A Cauldron (1)
Replies: 6
Views: 128

Re: Three Drops From A Cauldron (1)

Cheers Tristan.

best

mac
by Macavity
Sat Dec 01, 2018 3:27 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Avoiding the First Cut (revision 4)
Replies: 24
Views: 385

Re: Avoiding the Cut (revision)

it's a possibility, amongst many, Not.
...
Sexy grass in Spring:
mower blades rattle and spin
froglets leap
:)
by Macavity
Mon Nov 26, 2018 9:02 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Time
Replies: 6
Views: 154

Re: Time

The water is sweet and warm, the water is cold and thick, the water is bitter and brown. It buoys us up or pulls us down; it throws us against a rock or propels us with the fish; it dashes our every hope or fulfills our every wish. And when it’s finally over, we look back to discover: no shore, no ...
by Macavity
Mon Nov 26, 2018 8:43 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Mother Jazz (in E Minor Seventh) revised
Replies: 14
Views: 443

Re: Mother Jazz (in E Minor Seventh)

Thanks Mac, I’m never sure whether you think ‘ambitious phrasing’ is a good thing! What don’t you like about the rim of a chord image? Perhaps it’s a little far fetched. Cheers for commenting Luke Yes, it is a good thing. Not so much far-fetched, but I just couldn't thread tangible/intangible in th...
by Macavity
Mon Nov 26, 2018 8:34 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Avoiding the First Cut (revision 4)
Replies: 24
Views: 385

Re: Avoiding the Cut

Hi JJ, I suspect, on the evidence of your metered/rhyme poems, your preference is for frames/forms in writing poems. Like rattle , conveyed age and a waking up to spring in my mind. rattle/spin/leap do provide the energy. L1 is more a contextual statement. Do you need any punctuation? best mac Lush ...
by Macavity
Sun Nov 25, 2018 8:19 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Id (revision 2)
Replies: 11
Views: 315

Re: Id (revision 2)

I hang musical notes on telegraph wire, skewer the sun, jigsaw rain-clouds, picnic in the cemetery by night. Come, meet me by the rope-bridge, bring shears. Lever out my headstone; I'll use it as a mirror, silver-streak my hair with your epitaph. I never did do church on Sunday. I found the nihilis...
by Macavity
Sun Nov 25, 2018 8:10 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Snip (revision3)
Replies: 17
Views: 334

Re: Snip (revision)

Thanks for returning Moth. Some interesting ideas and suggestions. Will ponder! all the best mac Mac, I've just read your full explanation of the poem and I think it's worth sticking to the original theme, but the way the piece looks of the page (I think I was right when I said it was distracting) c...
by Macavity
Sun Nov 25, 2018 8:05 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Snip (revision3)
Replies: 17
Views: 334

Re: Snip (revision)

so I have no choice but to wade through obscure poems to offer critiques.
That doesn't sound like much fun Perry!

some buckets...

https://www.amazon.co.uk/ToyZe%C2%AE-Ca ... B01GIB3O3O
by Macavity
Sun Nov 25, 2018 1:42 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: High Priestess (version 2)
Replies: 16
Views: 720

Re: High Priestess (version 2)

hi Alex, After working along the revision path, I'd go back and look at the original. Pleased to see Great-Granny ...age/wisdom wild ...that seems to convey frenzy rather than wisdom...would you trust wild eyes?..the use of 'wide' triggered folktale associations, which seemed more appropriate. pause...
by Macavity
Sun Nov 25, 2018 8:34 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Snip (revision3)
Replies: 17
Views: 334

Re: Snip (revision)

A few things came to mind, mac, and still I remained uncertain, especially to the metaphor. The opening lines of the revision are easy to follow literally, but the turn requires some serious head work. : I think you are right JJ. I've been 'fighting' the poem. My intention was to write about a 'chi...
by Macavity
Sun Nov 25, 2018 1:03 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Snip (revision3)
Replies: 17
Views: 334

Re: Snip (revision)

Oh, snip... infertility? I may be way off.
Nope, exactly Moth! :D Those 'snipped' lines are a representation :) There has been many a debate on PG about short lines. I don't mind myself.

all the best

mac
by Macavity
Sun Nov 25, 2018 12:57 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Snip (revision3)
Replies: 17
Views: 334

Re: Snip

Thanks Tristan. Appreciate the insightful read and comments. I've cut the rhyme and for now kept the gull for being 'lost' (I like that bit, though it needs tidying). I'm clinging to castellated because of its specific/fairytale/protective associations... in my mind as least. Ditched the rhyme! chee...