Search found 4581 matches

by Macavity
Wed May 22, 2019 8:30 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)
Replies: 9
Views: 110

Re: Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)

Thanks Leaf. I think we have a shared interest in birds :) a family of sparrowhawks had taken all the songbirds. Horrendous, but nature can be 'red in claw',and human nature can be indifferent to 'sharing' the planet! Interesting how the extra detail steered the reading. Pleased you picked up on 'me...
by Macavity
Wed May 22, 2019 2:54 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: The Jolly Blue Dragon
Replies: 2
Views: 36

Re: The Jolly Blue Dragon

I particularly enjoyed the last two sections.

all the best

mac
by Macavity
Wed May 22, 2019 2:45 pm
Forum: Forum News and Support
Topic: Sorry
Replies: 3
Views: 37

Re: Sorry

No probs. Nicola, appreciate you sorting out the back room stuff!
by Macavity
Wed May 22, 2019 2:42 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: But is He?
Replies: 4
Views: 88

Re: But is He?

Hi David, I can relate to and empathise with this poem: being outside the rituals, beliefs, the comfort of religious routines, but intrigued. Of course, Latin language and Catholic ritual has worked its mystique in the same way. The mention of the garden has its biblical trigger and the doubts and p...
by Macavity
Mon May 20, 2019 8:05 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Good Old Fashioned Courage v4.
Replies: 16
Views: 490

Re: Good Old Fashioned Courage v4.

Dispense with Latin, say what is wrong, please,
use simple words, so common folk can ken:
am I 'sic transit', is my 'game up', how long
have I got? This wait is such a burden.
Elements of this are better than the revision because they are more emphatic.

best

mac
by Macavity
Mon May 20, 2019 7:45 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Seven
Replies: 2
Views: 47

Re: Seven

hi Peter,
The alignment of numbers and events implies the latter are preordained? Life as a 'vale of tears'?

best

mac
by Macavity
Sun May 19, 2019 4:04 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)
Replies: 9
Views: 110

Re: Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)

No, thanks to you Harbel. Help is always appreciated by me.

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sun May 19, 2019 4:03 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: The Witch’s Secret
Replies: 11
Views: 156

Re: The Witch’s Secret

hi Harbel

A fun, genre write. The folktale narrative worked for me, though the word formula sounded more chemistry than witchery :)

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sun May 19, 2019 11:43 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)
Replies: 9
Views: 110

Re: Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)

Thanks for taking a look Harbal. Pleased the image of the Robin translated for you. I've edited the poem in response to your thoughts. Thanks for the nudge!

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sun May 19, 2019 11:25 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: core structure of absence (revision)
Replies: 11
Views: 204

Re: core structure of absence (revision)

Hi riverrun, After several reads, I find this an interesting poem, probably because of the paradoxs and dichotomies. The title promises as much with structure/absence and that opening of stop/start/half-way. The intensity of love through absence is a relatable and familiar theme (though for some/man...
by Macavity
Sat May 18, 2019 12:28 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: core structure of absence (revision)
Replies: 11
Views: 204

Re: core structure of absence (revision)

You certainly have a range of knowledge... Nel mezzo del cammin di nostra vita. Those words comprise the first line of Dante's Inferno, and mean (in Allen Mandelbaum's translation) "When I had journeyed half of our life's way". Fractionation is a separation process in which a certain quantity of a m...
by Macavity
Sat May 18, 2019 5:09 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)
Replies: 9
Views: 110

Mum's Old Watering Can (revision)

revision There's no dawn chorus. Too urban. Too much meow. We water the herbs: a swaying fennel, the ever eager mint, a pot of thyme. A Robin's rambling along/above/beside not furtive, feisty. Streetwise. Perhaps the family dish later, a cawl: lamb, potatoes, carrots. No vegetable allotments. Just ...
by Macavity
Thu May 16, 2019 11:37 am
Forum: Poetry Discussion
Topic: Ledbury
Replies: 0
Views: 88

Ledbury

For those who may be interested:

https://www.poetry-festival.co.uk/2019-programme/
by Macavity
Thu May 16, 2019 6:57 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: core structure of absence (revision)
Replies: 11
Views: 204

Re: core structure of absence

There are hooks in this poem that pique an interest: mezzo del cammin/pranayama/magellanic clouds
.

My advice would be to look how David isolated and explored meaning in this poem:

viewtopic.php?f=3&t=23904

Will continue thinking about your write.

best

mac
by Macavity
Thu May 16, 2019 4:16 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: I Want No Part of Your Layered Cake
Replies: 9
Views: 177

Re: I Want No Part of Your Layered Cake

Hi Jackie, The poem translates the emotion of the experience. The form mirrors the breaking down of process. I like to blame the recipe too :) The use of ulcerated/perforating/innards draws on unsettling human parallels. However, the poem still delivers within the 'baking' frame - especially how the...
by Macavity
Mon May 13, 2019 6:38 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: A royal birth
Replies: 12
Views: 176

Re: A royal birth

I chose 'noble' because I thought using 'royal' again might seem repetitive; I was also hoping that the 'n' sound might enhance the 'snorts'. Fair enough Leaf. I have an association of 'noble' with barons/lords/earls/aristocracy rather than royality. Would 'regal' be an option? I didn't know 'bluin...
by Macavity
Mon May 13, 2019 4:24 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Homophones
Replies: 4
Views: 127

Re: Homophones

Playfully done David, the blurring of distinctions between human/animal, personal/general; and the reader is left to speculate as much as N. on the question. Like the play with skin and, of course, the use of Manx.

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Sun May 12, 2019 8:00 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: A royal birth
Replies: 12
Views: 176

Re: A royal birth

Hi leaf, Light and playful Sonnet, with a nudge to the important events of small worlds (though shared on a global medium). Two nits from me: wondered if 'royal' was more relevant than 'noble'; by 'bluing' is this a reference to clear sky? best mac Unless you follow Pittville Swans & Friends on Face...
by Macavity
Fri May 10, 2019 9:29 pm
Forum: Poetry Discussion
Topic: Armitage
Replies: 2
Views: 432

Re: Armitage

Ros wrote:
Wed Nov 07, 2018 3:04 pm
I think this was his application.

I rather liked '(not) someone who is a shop-steward for contemporary values first and a poet second (or third).' No point at all if the poetry doesn't come first.

Ros
yep!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-48228837
by Macavity
Fri May 10, 2019 2:38 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: Natural Beauty
Replies: 7
Views: 162

Re: Natural Beauty

I enjoyed this too Tony, though the title feels 'floaty' whereas the poem is grounded. A cast-off branch on a beach over time becomes a collector's item, wind-worn, sun bleached; the soul ..............nothing comes to mind, but the default word lacks impact of its form exposed like an old man's fac...
by Macavity
Fri May 10, 2019 2:09 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: In a Cemetery of Oak and Ash
Replies: 13
Views: 222

Re: In a Cemetery of Oak and Ash

Well, it was you who set me down the road to the epigrams of Erinna, and thence to the perideipnon, but I'll see what I can do. :roll: Did I? Perhaps there was a response in the original posting on the other forum that was deleted, which I hadn't read since I was out watching cricket that day :) ) ...
by Macavity
Tue May 07, 2019 7:27 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Experienced)
Topic: In a Cemetery of Oak and Ash
Replies: 13
Views: 222

Re: In a Cemetery of Oak and Ash

You have a taste for dark poetry Not! A macabre poem. I thought the voice in the poem worked. In general I felt the poem was darker and richer without the Greek referencing, but I guess you wanted to work the 'ceremony' angle.

cheers

mac
by Macavity
Mon May 06, 2019 9:25 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)
Replies: 19
Views: 302

Re: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)

Thank you Leaf. Welcome to the forum. I will reinstate 'has'. The warblers are migrant birds and so their return brings song and life to the trees (well that was my intention in the writing :) ) cheers mac Hi Mac, I'm Leaf and I've only just arrived at Poets' Graves. I hope you don't mind a newbie c...
by Macavity
Sun May 05, 2019 4:00 am
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)
Replies: 19
Views: 302

Re: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)

Hi Mac I like the way you build up to the last line/punchline of the piece. The second to last line seems a bit awkward though maybe replace thirst with something else, need maybe. Enjoyed Tony Thanks Tony. It was a thread back to coffee drinking as well as a theme signpost. The latter intentionall...
by Macavity
Fri May 03, 2019 8:36 pm
Forum: Post-a-Poem (Beginners)
Topic: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)
Replies: 19
Views: 302

Re: Parc Cwm Darran (revision2)

I never commented on this poem because I don't really get it. But since you frequently comment on my poems, I feel obliged to say something That's ok Perry. There's no obligation. I quite like some of your writing and comment on that, but not everything you write is to my taste. The place I visited...